Confession: I think we have made the decision to stop cloth diapering all together. And by we, I mean I. Lily didn't have much say in it. I don't think she gives a shit. Well, she gives lots of shit in the literal sense, but she doesn't care what that shit falls into.
Part of me feels like an asshole for making the switch to disposables. I think of all the money it has saved me and how much money I, in turn, spent on them over the past year or so. My diapers felt like my prized possessions at one point. Weird, I know. Only other cloth diaper obsessed moms will understand, so suck it.
We cloth diapered exclusively for fourteen months. We made it through what I'm sure is the hardest time to commit to cloth diapering - the newborn stage. I balanced laundry with nursing, sleeping, and learning how to be a mom. If I could do it then, when all of this was new and overwhelming and exhausting, why quit now?
I am hoping to have Lily out of diapers by the end of this year and, in the meantime, disposables are just so damn easy. I don't miss doing laundry every two or three days. I don't miss the borax and the bleach and the triple wash cycles. I don't miss stuffing my pocket diapers. I do miss being able to say that Lily had never been in disposables before. I do miss telling people all about how great cloth is when I'd be out and about and people would see her diaper.
I still think cloth is great, I do. It's just something that I don't think I want to deal with anymore. I've got plenty on my plate already, no one can deny that. It's nice to not have to worry about those few extra loads of laundry. I know it doesn't sound like a lot - what's a couple of extra washes anyways? But somehow, it felt like more than it actually was. And that's okay. It's okay to let myself take the easy route. That is something I am learning. There is no point in making things harder than they have to be. And for me, as a single parent that works full time, my free time would much rather be spent with my toddler than with my washing machine.
On that note, I still encourage anyone who is interested in cloth diapering to do it. Absolutely. And I will gladly offer advice, suggestions, tips, tricks, and enthusiasm. But tonight, when I go home, I'm going to sit back with my kid and enjoy another laundry-free weekday.